Megabyte
12-25-2004, 01:10 AM
Adendem: While I refer mainly to the sharper image, the same is applied replica competitor stores such as: Brookstone, The Discovery Channel Store, *future name store here*. If you think any of the listed ones is different (either being better or worse), then slap yourself once and stop reading this now, I don't hav time to explain why your wrong.
ME:
I'm a college student and, as a result, I must work many jobs that I'd rather shoot potatoes at. This results in grumpiness normally, but occasionally, more inventive thoughts occur while working.
I currently work as a sales associate at The Sharper Image. For those who don't know what we do...well, neither do I really. We sell stuff. For a lot of money usually (not much costs under $20, and most of our products go for at LEAST $100). Not useful stuff either (though we did temporarily carry ipods). Just expensive crap really.
The Store:
If your a simpson's fan, think back to the recent episode with them where they visited the store of completely useless stuff. Pretty much like that. At this point I'd like to say I'm being completely serious about my job.
We cater to...the upper class idiots. Our crap is expensive, so normal people like us can't afford it (I have a %50 discount and still couldn't afford most of it). Our crap is also crap, so....well, obviously the intelligent ppl shop elsewhere. If, for some odd reason, you doubt my great and concise means of explaining our products, I would be happy to add your address to our mailing list so you may recieve our catalogs each month. Or you can visit sharperimage.com; whatever works for u.
Now, the holiday seasons are particularly interesting. For those interested to know, we do make some big sales there. I'd say a normal selling day for most of the year our store (a decently sized and rated one in the company comparative) sells about $10-20k a day. During the holidays...this jumps by 2x-4x. Its not unusual for a single salesperson to sell upwards of 5k of goods in a day right now. This just goes to show you how much people like overpriced crap.
Really, anything mildly useful sold at TSI (the sharper image from now on as reference) can be found at many other stores for half the price and double the quality.
(I.e. our customers are stupid)
The customers:
What can i say about them? I'm glad I'm not one for starters. People are stupid, and they get moreso during the holidays. Your average customer willl mug you to get your attention, then shove you away once u've answered a question and drool/eat/break/etc the floor display of the product they are looking at.
The close to the holidays you get to, the more descpicable the customer become. The extreme happens today...on christmas eve. Actually, I take that back. The extreme happens on the weeks the State Fair is going on here in Sacramento...we get all the hicks from the towns and their revolting children visitng the store then. We hide the wax fruit on displays so the ppl won't hurt themselves and pad most of the sharp corners then.
The effects:
On the workers...we all become a little bitter (ok, more than a little). Its not easy continuously dealing with wealthy people whom can't figure out how hit a play button on a stereo. Whats worse, these wealthy people also have a lack of life and are usually bitter in some way themselves. This means that if you manage to anger them, they will literally go home, write a letter to the corporate office, and cause u a shit load of pain because they didn't like the way you held the doors open for them (more on that some other time).
The customers...well, its kinda satisfying to squeeze an extended warranty out of the rich ass u managed to swindle for $800. But still, this is the sort of thing that makes me feel a little sick. That idiots have money to spend here, and it doesn't even phase most fo them.
The store...Why are companies like these allowed to exist? I've dealt with the corporate office stucture of our company a good deal....Dilbert comics about sum it up (the HR guy looks like a cat too).
So...please remember to send some sort of blessing to these poor people involved with companies like these. Whether they be workers, or customers. If they're customers, slap them, then bless them.
ME:
I'm a college student and, as a result, I must work many jobs that I'd rather shoot potatoes at. This results in grumpiness normally, but occasionally, more inventive thoughts occur while working.
I currently work as a sales associate at The Sharper Image. For those who don't know what we do...well, neither do I really. We sell stuff. For a lot of money usually (not much costs under $20, and most of our products go for at LEAST $100). Not useful stuff either (though we did temporarily carry ipods). Just expensive crap really.
The Store:
If your a simpson's fan, think back to the recent episode with them where they visited the store of completely useless stuff. Pretty much like that. At this point I'd like to say I'm being completely serious about my job.
We cater to...the upper class idiots. Our crap is expensive, so normal people like us can't afford it (I have a %50 discount and still couldn't afford most of it). Our crap is also crap, so....well, obviously the intelligent ppl shop elsewhere. If, for some odd reason, you doubt my great and concise means of explaining our products, I would be happy to add your address to our mailing list so you may recieve our catalogs each month. Or you can visit sharperimage.com; whatever works for u.
Now, the holiday seasons are particularly interesting. For those interested to know, we do make some big sales there. I'd say a normal selling day for most of the year our store (a decently sized and rated one in the company comparative) sells about $10-20k a day. During the holidays...this jumps by 2x-4x. Its not unusual for a single salesperson to sell upwards of 5k of goods in a day right now. This just goes to show you how much people like overpriced crap.
Really, anything mildly useful sold at TSI (the sharper image from now on as reference) can be found at many other stores for half the price and double the quality.
(I.e. our customers are stupid)
The customers:
What can i say about them? I'm glad I'm not one for starters. People are stupid, and they get moreso during the holidays. Your average customer willl mug you to get your attention, then shove you away once u've answered a question and drool/eat/break/etc the floor display of the product they are looking at.
The close to the holidays you get to, the more descpicable the customer become. The extreme happens today...on christmas eve. Actually, I take that back. The extreme happens on the weeks the State Fair is going on here in Sacramento...we get all the hicks from the towns and their revolting children visitng the store then. We hide the wax fruit on displays so the ppl won't hurt themselves and pad most of the sharp corners then.
The effects:
On the workers...we all become a little bitter (ok, more than a little). Its not easy continuously dealing with wealthy people whom can't figure out how hit a play button on a stereo. Whats worse, these wealthy people also have a lack of life and are usually bitter in some way themselves. This means that if you manage to anger them, they will literally go home, write a letter to the corporate office, and cause u a shit load of pain because they didn't like the way you held the doors open for them (more on that some other time).
The customers...well, its kinda satisfying to squeeze an extended warranty out of the rich ass u managed to swindle for $800. But still, this is the sort of thing that makes me feel a little sick. That idiots have money to spend here, and it doesn't even phase most fo them.
The store...Why are companies like these allowed to exist? I've dealt with the corporate office stucture of our company a good deal....Dilbert comics about sum it up (the HR guy looks like a cat too).
So...please remember to send some sort of blessing to these poor people involved with companies like these. Whether they be workers, or customers. If they're customers, slap them, then bless them.