Bureaucragolem

[Devlin777]

BUREAUCRAGOLEM:

History:
Throughout the ages, man's predisposition to impose "self-governing" rule on humanity has brought about more and more red-tape, long-winded pontificating and ever increasing infringement on true civil liberty and autonomy. As the generations progressed toward this oppressive personality trait, some individuals "Evolved" into creatures whos very nature was to filibuster and orally flatulate until their victims, glass eyed and will-broken, gave in to every over-complex detail of their oppressors whim. These creatures were called BUREAUCRAGOLEMS.

Statistics:
Hit Points: 1
Power: --
Armor: --
Movement Range: 0
Recovery Time: 2

Attack Pattern:
BUREAUCRAGOLEM attacks via a sonic blast from it's highly evolved vocal chords. This blast causes all opposing units to begin their recovery phase as if they'd moved and attacked on their previous turn.

Special Abilities:
For each BUREAUCRAGOLEM killed, two more spring to life in the nearest adjacent free tile.


Tactics:
BUREAUCRAGOLEMS are physically weak, cannot wear armor and have no defensive abilities other than there will always be more. Place your BUREAUCRAGOLEM near the front, where it can be easily killed, as that is to your benefit. Once your opponent cannot advance through the ocean of "bureaucracy", you are free to pick off units at your leisure. However, when no more opposing forces are available, BUREAUCRAGOLEM will abandon your forces and attack you as the enemy.

[Lonely Tylenol]

Bureaucrats that regenerate and multiply?

In just a few turns you could have several dozen units to impose bureaucracy and stingy, ridiculous laws!

Oh, the horror! THE HORRRRORRRRRR!

[Devlin777]

I take it you like? :cool:

[Cross Punisher]

How do you win if the Bureaucragolem can't be killed? Why put it up front when it has no range, and only effects your opponent's units?

Doesn't Bureaucrat mean something like smart, and if this is true how can a golem be that smart?

[Lonely Tylenol]

Bureaucrats aren't smart, just evil.

And they're like cockroaches, which explains why you can't kill them off.

Also, since they have no souls, it's safe to assume they don't count as endgame units. :cool:

[Cross Punisher]

I know it has something to do with politics :p

EDIT: I see you edited to add something new so so will I. "He who does not punish evil, commands it to be done."

[Dove]

*snicker*

Fairly balanced.

[Devlin777]

How do you win if the Bureaucragolem can't be killed?


"Aye, there's the rub" - The Bard

[Cross Punisher]

I found the intro unique :cool:

[Devlin777]

Thank you! If you don't mind, I'mma put that quote in my sig!

[Hellblazer]

The ability is quite interesting. I'd give this unit an A-, except the health and muliplying situtions bring the unit's quality down by alot. Basically, this thing is instantly killed and therefore immediately multiplies. You can't have a unit like this unless you don't have any other units on the field. And that's useless because all it can do is make your opponent's units begin recovery.
Unit Grade: D-(fix it and it's good)

[Lonely Tylenol]

The ability is quite interesting. I'd give this unit an A-, except the health and muliplying situtions bring the unit's quality down by alot. Basically, this thing is instantly killed and therefore immediately multiplies. You can't have a unit like this unless you don't have any other units on the field. And that's useless because all it can do is make your opponent's units begin recovery.
Unit Grade: D-(fix it and it's good)

:mad: If the initial post didn't tell you this was a spoof, the reaction should have. Try reading the post/thread before you "grade" these.

[Speed_Demon]

the only thing i dont like is it it cant be killed that would make gold games take forever. other than that i like the idea of your unit

[Devlin777]

You know, with a little tweaking, this might get certified.

**cue evil laugh**