Dorky grammar thread

[Northwind]

Ok, all I really wanted to do was to reply to the other awards thread so that our poor little Dutch boy wouldn't go around all mis-informed. However, just as I went to do so, the thread was closed. :angry: Now I have to make a new thread that will make me look like a huge noob. :(
I would add that if I were willing to spend 6 hours, or allow my judges to spend 6 hours finding nominee's... too much...Why is it were in that sentence and not was?
Because I had an awful High School grammar teacher.OK, not to be a giant, giant dork or anything, but meat, your high school teacher was better than you thought. You would use "were" in this sentence as it is the future subjunctive conjugation used after a counterfactual condition (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subjunctive#Future_subjunctive)

Actually, in my defense, my wife is the giant, giant dork who said "No, he's right, that's the subjunctive conjugation." Talk about sexy! :)

[Tama Drummer]

I was going to post something in that thread too, and then it was closed after I went to press "Submit Reply"! :mad:

It robbed me of my pc+1!!

So I'll make up for it in this thread too. :D
Only, I forget what I was going to say...

[HorNeT]

I am too lazy to read this, but since it's in that famous blue I'm going to asume it's hilarious and just laugh my ass off.

[Hellblazer]

Way to be, Northwind! You're my hero!

[bullcat0]

Way to be, Northwind! You'r my hero!
Way to suck up! You're my zero!

[shatterstar]

future subjunctive conjugation used after a counterfactual condition


that might very well be the most complicated phrase in the history of TAO forums.

[rip32]

that might very well be the most complicated phrase in the history of TAO forums.

I agree...I can't even pronounce it right.:(

[Elentari]

Northy, I would so go lesbian for your wife. :p

[meat.eater]

You forgot to end your quotation, there, chief. :)

[Northwind]

Northy, I would so go lesbian for your wife. :p
Hmmm . . . this opens up new realms of possibilities that I've never dared consider before. :) (Well, OK, who am I kidding? Of course, I've considered them.) :dry:

[BaxVarlet]

Hmmm . . . this opens up new realms of possibilities that I've never dared consider before. :) (Well, OK, who am I kidding? Of course, I've considered them.) :dry:

I'd like to nominate the above post as the best post of the year.

[Northwind]

I'd like to nominate the above post as the best post of the year.
Then I'd like to nominate the above post as the best post of the year. :dry:

By the way, I apologize for my addiction to the :dry: smilie. I just love it sooo much!

[Tama Drummer]

By the way, I apologize for my addiction to the :dry: smilie. I just love it sooo much!

I guessing you haven't discoverred the :noway: smile yet? It's clearly the best one...

[WaCk-HeAd]

Even though I still can't believe you're not the most hated member of this community, I can't deny this didn't help me out a bit.

So....thanks. There, I said it. You can put this in my face forever and ever, but at least I'm man enough to see when someone helps me. So screw you man. Seriously, Screw you!

Oh and thank your wife as well...oh wait, I can just do that tonight!! OOoooooooohhhhh!!!!!
Sorry, Miss Northwind! Just a bad joke! I appreciate the effort.
:)

[EatMine]

OK, not to be a giant, giant dork or anything, but meat, your high school teacher was better than you thought. You would use "were" in this sentence as it is the future subjunctive conjugation used after a counterfactual condition (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subjunctive#Future_subjunctive)Ok, to be a giant, giant dork and exactly that, but North, your wife is not 100% correct (in my humble opinion).
I read the text about english subjunctive rules and i think this case is not "future subjunctive", but just the normal past subjunctive used after the conjunction "if" in a contrary-to-fact protasis, to express a hypothesis. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subjunctive#To_express_a_hypothesis)

As in: if i had a sexy wife, i would ... (dammit, this hypotheses stuff makes me sad)


Edit: just read your post again, and actually your wife was right. She didn't say anything about "future subjunctive ". It's just that you (like all men) did not listen carefully enough and made up your own mind :)

[bludhoundz]

I guessing you haven't discoverred the :noway: smile yet? It's clearly the best one...
:smartass:

[ReTodd]

Even though I still can't believe you're not the most hated member of this community, I can't deny this didn't help me out a bit.

So....thanks. There, I said it. You can put this in my face forever and ever, but at least I'm man enough to see when someone helps me. So screw you man. Seriously, Screw you!
Wack, at least English is not your native language. English has to be the most convoluted language in the universe. I can't explain why I write some things the way I do, I am just able to look at a phrase or sentence and recognise if the grammar is correct.

My favorite way to screw with people and make them feel inferior to my awesomeness is when I answer the phone and someone asks for me I reply, "This is he". It always makes people think for a second and makes you look impressive if a prospective employer is calling.

[DOCTOR DEVICE]

Even though I still can't believe you're not the most hated member of this community, I can't deny this didn't help me out a bit.

So....thanks. There, I said it. You can put this in my face forever and ever, but at least I'm man enough to see when someone helps me. So screw you man. Seriously, Screw you!

Oh and thank your wife as well...oh wait, I can just do that tonight!! OOoooooooohhhhh!!!!!
Sorry, Miss Northwind! Just a bad joke! I appreciate the effort.
:)
The Dutch scum screws up again!

:smartass:

[Hugh Junit]

I am too lazy to read this, but since it's in that famous blue I'm going to asume it's hilarious and just laugh my ass off.

NO!
You will read every word of this tread, HorNet!
Every hilarious future subjunctive conjugation and knee-slapping counterfactual condit...

* reads thread again *

Okay, HorNet. Maybe you're right. It's not necessarily Northwind's finest work.
But didn't I read something about lesbians in here?

[DOCTOR DEVICE]

But didn't I read something about lesbians in here?
Oh and thank your wife as well...oh wait, I can just do that tonight!! OOoooooooohhhhh!!!!!


That would be that...:D

;)

[Northwind]

Even though I still can't believe you're not the most hated member of this community, I can't deny this didn't help me out a bit.
Glad to be of service. I'm also glad to hear that I'm NOT the most hated member of this community. However, I'm sure my next thread about deconstructionism and loss of subjective meaning will place me firmly in the "most hated" category once again.
Edit: just read your post again, and actually your wife was right. She didn't say anything about "future subjunctive ". It's just that you (like all men) did not listen carefully enough and made up your own mind :)
Well, yeah, you're probably right. I'm sort of like ReTodd -- I know what sounds right but generally can't tell you why. I thought that meat's sentence was right and read it to my wife (who's a writer). She brought up the whole "subjunctive" thing and I went to wiki to try to find a link explaining it. Frankly, I found all those explanations pretty overwhelming and probably picked the wrong instance. So, fine, you're right. Happy? You now get to wear the crown of "giant, giant dork." :king2: That's OK, it's heavy and kind of chafed my head a bit.
Okay, HorNet. Maybe you're right. It's not necessarily Northwind's finest work.
OK, punk. Maybe it WASN'T my finest moment. Maybe it did "stink up the joint." Maybe it was "shallow and pedantic." Maybe it did make me look "like a huge fucktard." But at least I'm still in there giving 110%. At least I'm still willing to put myself on the line each and every day in order bring a little more light and learning to this hall of ignomy. At least . . . ah screw it . . . you're right. Not my best work. :( But I did get an offer from Ele to go all lesbo on my wife. That's worth somthing isn't it?

[WaCk-HeAd]

However, I'm sure my next thread about deconstructionism and loss of subjective meaning will place me firmly in the "most hated" category once again.


Do it! Do it! Do it! I dare you! Do it!

[Realist]

However, I'm sure my next thread about deconstructionism and loss of subjective meaning will place me firmly in the "most hated" category once again.

You absolutely must make this thread. :cool:

[Northwind]

Do it! Do it! Do it! I dare you! Do it!
You absolutely must make this thread.
Are you kidding me? I have no idea how to do that. Hell, I thought I just made those words up. You mean that sentence actually made sense? :huh:

[Realist]

Are you kidding me? I have no idea how to do that. Hell, I thought I just made those words up. You mean that sentence actually made sense? :huh:

It matters not! We need more threads to have meaningless arguments in.

[DOCTOR DEVICE]

Shut up and make it dorkface! You're good at making up words!

... Or you could always go with the act of symbolic castration and ask your wife! :bigsmile:

[Ignition]

Way to be, Northwind! You'r my hero!
Apparently it’s his wife and not him this time… cool

[~GooseR~]

It's threads like this...















...That make me horny. :shocked:

[Hellblazer]

Way to suck up! You're my zero!
Do some research. I'm a grammar nazi, remember?:p