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Chieck Kongo
09-09-2006, 07:39 PM
"-Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party.

As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!

Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.

He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick! "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table,
eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

Confused he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh THAT!... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, lady, I'm married!"

Broken Coffee Table $ 339.99
Hot Breakfast $ 4.20
Two Aspirins $ .38
Saying the right thing, at the right time . . PRICELESS!!!"

ThinkTank
09-09-2006, 07:45 PM
That was worth the chuckle.

shatterstar
09-09-2006, 07:47 PM
*chuckle*

Wizzy`
09-09-2006, 08:03 PM
mmm..chuckles..

Chieck Kongo
09-09-2006, 08:15 PM
Since when do men/males chuckle?

Wizzy`
09-09-2006, 08:18 PM
Since when do men/males chuckle?

Sexist.

shatterstar
09-09-2006, 09:01 PM
*snort*/*grunt*

happy?

Forest_Archer
09-09-2006, 09:02 PM
Real men don't chuckle. They giggle.

ThinkTank
09-09-2006, 09:04 PM
Since when do men/males chuckle?

Has anyone ever told you how completely cocky you act?

Real men don't chuckle. They giggle.

What's the difference? :huh:

bludhoundz
09-09-2006, 09:08 PM
I liked it.

Chieck Kongo
09-09-2006, 09:08 PM
Has anyone ever told you how completely cocky you act?

No.

Chieck Kongo
09-09-2006, 09:12 PM
Jagbag is a funny word, TT.

ThinkTank
09-09-2006, 09:17 PM
Isn't it?

Why don't you just stick with one account pieface? Multiples are lame.

Edit: hmm.

Daemon Bloodmaw
09-09-2006, 10:12 PM
Hahaha, that's so true..

some1udontknow
09-10-2006, 02:40 AM
Thats cool. Good thing he said that.

Merdoc.
09-10-2006, 03:31 AM
I hate to say it. But this spam.....AWSOME!

Chieck Kongo
09-10-2006, 07:55 AM
Isn't it?

Why don't you just stick with one account pieface? Multiples are lame.

Edit: hmm.

It sure is.

Boo hoo.

†Nuke'em†
09-10-2006, 04:21 PM
Awesome, good little chuckle there.

drakonfire
09-10-2006, 10:28 PM
i have to say i really enjoyed that one

WaCk-HeAd
09-11-2006, 04:38 AM
Personally, I think the dude's a douchebag.

Sure, it all turned out fine for hem in the end, but he didn't know it was his wife.

It could very easily have been a very hot chick he just turned down.

Man, what a moron.

This is why you never have to drink so much that you can't judge women clearly anymore.

EatMine
09-11-2006, 06:13 AM
A German, a beautiful girl, a nun and a Dutchman are sitting in a train. Suddenly the train drives into a tunnel and since the lights are not working, it gets completely dark. Then one hears a slap in the face and when the train comes out of the tunnel, the dutch guy holds his face in pain. "Good!" thinks the nun. "The Dutchman obviously tried to grab the girl and therefor she slapped him". "Good!" thinks the girl, "The Dutchman probably tried to grab me in the dark, but accidentally touched the nun, so she slapped him." "What the hell" thinks the dutch guy. "The German probably tried to grab the girl, accidentally touched the nun and when the she tried to slap him, the scumbag ducked down so that she hit me instead." Whereas the German thinks: "In the next tunnel i'm gonna give the Dutchman a bunch of fives again."

S_K_O_F
09-11-2006, 10:19 AM
Real men don't chuckle. They giggle.

giggling is for pansies!

Shiny Flors
09-11-2006, 01:26 PM
*giggles*


Wait wait , I mean

*chuckle*