How to treat your girl...

[Megabyte]

Most of you don't seem like you don't know, and since I'm such a helpful person when the situation calls for it, it seemed like a good idea to help you all out.

Girls, what few of you there are who will read this, please move along. There's nothing for you here.

(Edit: Will be editing this and updating it)

This is NOT a guide for how to "get" a girl, how to get laid, or how to do a large variety of other crap we chest beat to each other. This is how shit needs to go down for real, no exceptions, if you want to have a real relationship with a real life person (to whatever degree you plan on having said relationship, this works for them all).

I'm an open minded person for most things (or so I think), but somewhere along the way in my life this topic became rather set in stone, as it were. Following the things detailed below has never worked against me, and I'm pretty forward about it's advocation for my guy friends and my female friends boytoys. This is something that I take seriously, and I've had to slap around more than a few guys I know for improper behavior. Call it old fashioned, I call it proper and it's never steered me wrong (or anyone else that I've known).

More than a few failed relationships litter my past, and most of them stem from poor decisions on either side's fault. Some of these things I've learned from those relationships, others I've simply found have worked (like a charm) all my life.

Now, boys, guys, compadres, dudes, and idiots alike all need to be on the ball for these things. All of your bad relationships incidents can (realistically) come down to breaking the guidelines described below. Anyone who is so crazy or off the wall where these things wouldn't work isn't likely stable enough to be in a relationship anyways.

While you aren't guaranteed a successful and happy relationship, this will go leaps and bounds to helping it along. These "guidelines" are intended to provide a healthy and happy setup for any sort of relationship. If the concepts given here aren't workable for you, realistically I don't think you should be in a relationship with your girl. Each of them is a special person, who deserves a guy who treats her right. If you can't treat her right, be a man and end the relationship so that someone else can.

So, lets get down to business, yes?

Early Relationship
A very important time for all involved. There are several key points which need to be addressed. These are concepts that come into play at this point, but should be in constant use forever after.

Low impact

When you start dating and entering a relationship, keep in mind the concept of low impact. This is in regards to your (hers included) lives. Life should not drastically alter itself to revolve around this new relationship. Your lives should be inclusive, to whatever extent your relationship warrants, and grow from there. Keep in mind inclusive doesn't mean all inclusive, and if you find your (or her) life suddenly revolving around the other, it needs to change.



Alteration of lives is bad, intergration is good. The rest of the guidelines for this part are based off this concept. It's up to you and your individual situation to figure out how to work this idea into your relationships.

1. Friends
Along with the above idea, is integrating yourself with each other's friends. This is a commonly overlooked idea for many guys, and it's not something you can overlook. Her friends are her social life, you need to ingratiate yourself with this aspect. Having her friends aware, and ever better approving, of yourself will make your girl a happier and better person for it.

Remember, her friends don't need to become your friends, but they shouldn't be someone whom you've never met 6 months down the road.

2. Family
This kinda tags with friends but is even more important. Not optional, on any level, for a good relationship. You are NOT family, at this stage at least (whether you have designs to one day be or not). Family comes first, and that should be remembered for both of you.

With that in mind, meet and greet the family. Whether they like you are not, they are her family, and they deserve to be made fully and completely aware of you. Special effort should ALWAYS be taken to ingratiate yourself with the family.

As a side note, while it's sometimes easier in certain cases than others, getting on the good side of your girl's family should be an absolute top priority for any relationship. I've yet to encounter a situation where there was no way for me to befriend any of my girl at that time's family.



All of these concepts are just to help define what your role beyond the basic relationship should be. Keep them in mind when it comes to your girl, and remember there is more to her than just her herself (now that's some zen shit).


Longer Relationship
Some relationships are longer and larger than others. Some concepts come into play the farther in you go, read on if you aren't retarded enough to think that you'll never need it.

Integration (again)

Deserving another look is this concept. As your relationship with your girl expands and lasts, you'll need to re-examine how you integrate your lives. More and more of your activities will start involving your girl, in some way. This is inevitable, and not such a bad thing as we usually make it out to be.

Keep in mind her individual ideals and life as a whole as new things start to come to light about each other. Again, the rest of the ideas below revolve around this concept. Each of you should examine your lives in relation to your girl as time goes on, figure out where you are now and where you want to be (and how to best get there without stepping outside of the guidelines).


The first sections points of family and friends should be constantly in mind here. Along with your constantly integrated life is the rest of your girl's life, and those that surround it. You don't want to be the reason for her to lose friends, or have her family mad at her.

Along with the old points some new ones come into play. Variety is said to be the spice of life, and it certainly holds true when dealing with your girl. You need to be proactive about the things you do, the places you go, and everything therein when it comes to her. Gifts are necessary, like it or not, for every girl (though the extent varies from one to another). Activities are also necessary, and the type needs to be something that suites you both. She needs to be happy with the things you are doing, so don't turn in Shawn and hang at the Winchester each evening.

If you aren't enjoying doing things with your girl, and don't like the way things are going, it's time to end the relationship. This needs to be done right, and handled with the proper ideals (more below), but needs to be done as it's the best for your girl.

Overall, just keep in your girl in mind when you see your own life. We all can take care of ourselves, to various extents, otherwise we wouldn't be in a relationship in the first place (and if you can't, you shouldn't be). So that's not really a factor beyond what it always was for yourself.


More to come....

[Megabyte]

Personal Concepts

The most important concepts are detailed here. These are universal, and should always be observed. I've dated a variety of personalities, with a variety of origins, and a variety of ideals. From feminists to wannabe homemakers, these concepts have never wavered for me, and they shouldn't for you.

Each girl needs to be treated with some variance in regards to all of these ideals. Some of the more socially liberal ones might disdain much of these, but you won't. That's the idea here, that there are certain things that not negotiable in the way a guy should behave.

1. Respect

Beyond a doubt, THE concept for your relationship. Respect for her, her life, her ideals, her personality. Everything about your dealings with your girl should involve this.

2. Protection

She's your girl, help her out. Some girls argue this, but at the end of the day they look to their guy to help them out in some way or another. We each do this in our own fashion, and the relationship itself dictates this, but it needs to be done.

You are not the end all protector, the sole source of comfort, or the problem solver in entirety, but you need to be a part of all those things.

3. Treatment
A lot of this is simple common sense on appropriate behavior. But still, just to be thorough...

Physically, mentally, and socially, this needs to be done right (keeping in mind the first 2 points). Physically, I shouldn't even need to go into. If you need this part described and spelled out you aren't ready for a relationship.

Mentally, should be handled similarly to physical. Bullying, abuse, and simple poor behavior on this front is just as bad for the mind as the body. Socially, I've been detailing concepts that deal with this the whole time, so you shouldn't need to much more help here. Just remember that the rules that apply here for your girl also apply to her friends and family.

4. Public vs Private

Dignity is the key, as well as the other rules in regard to this. Show her courtesy, respect, and helpfulness. Be proactive publicly in this regard and the way you act towards your girl. Affection is ok, and many girls like to have it shown to them publicly, simply keep certain ideals and a certainty dignity towards your relationship since it reflect on her as well as you.

Just keep in mind the separation between the two areas. What's ok for one is not ok for another. Gratuitous displays are generally a problem, if not for the two of you then for what they do to the other concepts given here.

5. Money

All girls are expensive. There's no way around that. Some are more than others, but your girl is inevitably going to cost you money. If you don't have any to spare, a real relationship isn't the place for you.

I had a year in my life when I was transitioning from being a musician to a working stiff for my primary income. This was a hard time and I didn't have a lot of money. I knew a nice girl then and we sometimes went out, and while we got to know each other better and continued to hang out regularly I avoided a real relationship then because of my financial situation. After a while, I got better work, had less school demands, and had more money. I was able to pursue her in a real relationship and was glad for the waiting.

Nothing is worse than becoming "the mooch" guy, whom your girl needs to support and cover for. Live in fear of this standing, as it's akin to the abusive boyfriend in my book. You have become a drain on your girl, and in all reality if you gave any sort of damn about her you would break it off (for now at least).

Seriously examine your financial situation when contemplating your relationship in regards to your girl. Whoever she may be, she deserves someone who can treat her right in this regard as well as others.

5. Social Ideals

Let's face it, you won't always see eye to eye with your girl. This will cause problems.

Compromise it the key, and as the guy in the relationship it's up to YOU to be a man and make it your compromise, more often than not. You need to make sure she is happy and comfortable with your compromises, your happiness is realistically second, since if she's being treated right and is happy you should be as well.

Various things can come up here, and while we should never sacrifice our principles in compromise (if it comes to that, you should re-examine whether you should be in the relationship), you should keep her as the higher priority. Ideally things will work out so both of you can be happy, but such isn't always the case and you should know where you need to stand.


So there you have it. These concepts are meant to help you treat your girl right, but are not an end all guide. This is simply the start, and it's up to you to figure out how to properly deal with your girl in the appropriate way.

[Liquid Swordsman]

before I read all this and make some actual comments, what are your credentials?

I don't want to be reading just any average joe's tips on how to treat my woman, it could be sabotage

[Poop Slinger]

This is the Troutmaster.. He used to be the TrimMaster I would take his advice. I mean after all.. he isn't married!

[Coffin Fedder]

Well, Megabyte is a very helpful person everyone. Giving member of society, you'll learn much from reading. His sharing his logic, love it, embrace it. Do what ever you can.

[Megabyte]

This is the Troutmaster.. He used to be the TrimMaster I would take his advice. I mean after all.. he isn't married!

True enough, I'm not married.

But, this is not a guide on how to get married, so thank goodness for that.


I'm aware of my limitations in experience when it comes to the opposite gender, and I won't pretend that this will get you married (or should be used). Once you are married your lives are integrated, and you've beyond the relationship where these sorts of concepts are totally in practice.

Marriage is far more complicated and detailed, and I can't begin to get into that until I've had some experience there. Even the full intracsies of a relationship are far beyond anything that can be simply posted. As is said in the opening part, this is not a guide on how to have a successful relationship (nor a guarantee).


This is something every guy, regardless of age or background, should know when it comes on how to treat their girl during the relationship phase(s). A basic guideline of sorts. Nothing more, nothing less. It simply needs to be observed, and I felt that it was a bit of information a number of guys here were missing in their lives.


As to my own qualifications...I'm a 23 year old know it all. I've had a variety of relationships with various girls of various levels of seriousness. My current relationship is just over a year in length, with a lovely young lady whome I treat right. Much of what has been said in this post is stated and re-stated throughout the posts.

[KBHoleN1]

I read a little, sounded very sound in concept. Maybe I'll read the whole thing when I feel like it, but the part about short relationships is very good. I don't often feel this way about threads here, but this may actually help someone.

*frantically writing notes*

[Jeffery]

I prefer to slap the piss out of her once in a while just so she doesn;t forget her place.

[-Dape-]

I prefer to slap the piss out of her once in a while just so she doesn;t forget her place.

:rofl:

I'd knew you'd say something like that, Jeff.

Very nice helpful tips you're giving the young ones, Megabyte.

[Liquid Swordsman]

now to help out dape, why don't you make

"how to treat your black transgender he/she/man thing"

[-Dape-]

now to help out dape, why don't you make

"how to treat your black transgender he/she/man thing"

Why don't you go out and get a girlfriend, looks like you just beat your meat over small childern over the internet, sick little boy.

[Liquid Swordsman]

I'd rather just laugh at your 2 gay dads

[-Dape-]

I'd rather just laugh at your 2 gay dads

Yet you don't even know me or where i live, very amussing.

I find it funny how you can only insult people over the internet...real life...i think everyone on these forums would kick your ass, even Deepsea.

[Punishment]

21.7 ml/s.

[Liquid Swordsman]

bitch i'm 6'2 230 I'd ruin your punk ass so don't try to act all tough guy with me

[-Dape-]

bitch i'm 6'2 230 I'd ruin your punk ass so don't try to act all tough guy with me

I'm 6'4 and i'm 12 stone (don't know what it's in pound) and i train every day, i'm going into the army...i would slaughter you like a butcher does to a cow..

[Liquid Swordsman]

I'm 6'4 and i'm 12 stone (don't know what it's in pound) and i train every day, i'm going into the army...i would slaughter you like a butcher does to a cow..

Wow so you are pretend to be as tough in real life as you do here? Jeesh, you are a crazy, crazy transgender dating, 2 fathered son of a gun

[-Dape-]

Wow so you are pretend to be as tough in real life as you do here? Jeesh, you are a crazy, crazy transgender dating, 2 fathered son of a gun

Pretending? :rofl:

So you put "I'm 6"2 and 230 pounds i'd ruin your life" is not acting tough over the internet?

I would murder you...no doubt about it...i don't need to pretend.

[Liquid Swordsman]

But see the thing is I wrote that as more or less of a joke, and you answered exactly how I knew you would.

I knew you'd say you were bigger and tougher. Come on dape, this isn't even fun anymore, it's like picking on someone with 2 gay dads! Oh, wait..

[Megabyte]

this thread went in an amusing direction :)


but it's bumped up, so I don't mind

[Wizzy`]

bitch i'm 6'2 230 I'd ruin your punk ass so don't try to act all tough guy with me

I'm 6'4 and i'm 12 stone (don't know what it's in pound) and i train every day, i'm going into the army...i would slaughter you like a butcher does to a cow..

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
omfg.
thank you both for being such dumbasses.

[Unforgottner]

But see the thing is I wrote that as more or less of a joke

Sure you did.

[Wisher]

Solve it in a dance war.

[gryph89]

So long as she can make a mean sandwhich. I'm happy with any girl.

[bloodreign]

All girls are expensive. There's no way around that. Some are more than others, but your girl is inevitably going to cost you money.

I guess, but i'm a pool boy so that rule does not apply to me.

So basicaly you failed in several relationships and found ou the hard way not how to do things?

WORDS OF WISDOM don't be like megabyte.

My money is on Dape.

[R G]

I guess, but i'm a pool boy so that rule does not apply to me.

So basicaly you failed in several relationships and found ou the hard way not how to do things?

WORDS OF WISDOM don't be like megabyte.

My money is on Dape.



Being that you are a pool boy, what is the going rate to clean out my pool and prepare it for winter.:rolleyes:


My money would be on Dape too...knowing that Dape is a master of deciept and deception he would bring a gun and blow the brains out of a baby...bringing new meaning to "like taking candy from a baby".

[Liquid Swordsman]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
omfg.
thank you both for being such dumbasses.

I'd beat the bag outta you too little guy

[Megabyte]

I guess, but i'm a pool boy so that rule does not apply to me.


When you're ready to deal with reality and stop being retarded, come talk to me. I'm usually willing to help the fools find their way back into the real world. Universal means universal, and those that think they are the exceptions generally are the ones in most desperate need to learn these things.


As to the rest of it, you have quite the ability for taking the obvious and announcing it as a revelation. Of course you shouldn't make the mistakes I made, are you really that slow? The idea is for you to learn from my mistakes from what I tell you, and from your response it sounds like you could really use the extra help.

If you need any input (and I'm sure when you actually get some sense, you'll realize you will), and don't know whom else to speak with, feel free to send me a pm. Perhaps I can provide some insight, and at the worst I can help send you to someone closer to your life who can do so.

[bloodreign]

Deal with reality? i'm a pool boy for goodnesakes! my tannned oiled up body is sweet, i am a golden god! woman are at my left and right.

Btw you can do whatever you want with your "reality" take your DR.PHILL crap outa here.

A man can do anything he wants to women, he can sell their bodies on the street n slappem up.
He can make them slaves! do this, do that,... he can take concubines and produce abundant children to procure his lineage.
Man is Man! women are subordinate and must bring offerings to man..WHO WEARS THE PANTS!

You my freind need to toughen up, your too soft.
Your all " lets watch all the pretty horses again... or maybe we can watch Horse Whisperer one more time....i love it when brad pitt cries...*ghasp* he is so emotionaly connected to his feminine side.."

Btw just apply the golden rule, no need to spout off all this jumbo shmumbo.

[Megabyte]

Kid, you're so clueless and ignorant I'm disappointed to admit you're probably just gonna have to live with it for a while until you figure it out. You can tell yourself whatever you want, but your sad attempt to boast yourself just says to everyone else that you're that much more an empty windbag. Gotta be pretty desperate to save that ideal if you felt the need to directly talk yourself up.

You have no clue about me at all, or how laughable your "poolboy" status is from my perspective. I have absolutely nothing to prove against self deluded fools, especially some random one on the net. Your concept of "toughening up" is pathetic, and your ideals are the living proof of it. I'm not sure what retarded logic you came up with, but the idea of being tough coming from bossing around the women around them is just sad. Must be a real tough guy to pick on a girl, huh? When you feel like really showing some strength, we can talk. Until then, don't even bother saying anything else on the subject, you're just embarrassing yourself.




But,as I've said, I'm sure you'll hit the real world someday. Hopefully it won't take you as long as it did me to catch on to the real scope of things. Just pray you don't run into someone like me while you're like this. We don't take too kindly to guys who mistreat the women around them, and we're not subtle about how I feel such things should be dealt with. Sometimes words work, sometimes it takes a more direct approach. No regrets either way, as long as you eventually get the message.

[bloodreign]

Just pray you don't run into someone like me while you're like this. We don't take too kindly to guys who mistreat the women around them, and we're not subtle about how I feel such things should be dealt with. Sometimes words work, sometimes it takes a more direct approach.

Veiled threats are the tools of weak women lovers, so as far as i'm concerned i would love to THROW DOWN!

I bet if you saw my 6'5 265 pound black ass frame slapping my hoe in a club you would just stand there and do nothing! WHUT!

Thought so..... go and save another planet superman.

[Hugh Junit]

A man can do anything he wants to women, he can sell their bodies on the street n slappem up.
He can make them slaves! do this, do that,... he can take concubines and produce abundant children to procure his lineage.
Man is Man! women are subordinate and must bring offerings to man..WHO WEARS THE PANTS!



I've been thinking about an idea for a movie, just jotting down notes and working on a rough screenplay.
The working title is The 40 Year Old Virgin Poolboy. I think you'd be absolutely perfect for the lead role.
In 20 years or so.
:)

[Megabyte]

Probably more like 25-30 years, judging by the sheer level of bs coming from this one. Still, who knows, maybe he is 20 and just THAT slow a learner.

And someone explain to me when being a poolboy was some sort of attractive job to have?
Veiled threats are the tools of weak women lovers, so as far as i'm concerned i would love to THROW DOWN!

I bet if you saw my 6'5 265 pound black ass frame slapping my hoe in a club you would just stand there and do nothing! WHUT!

Thought so..... go and save another planet superman.

Heh, cute kid, almost witty. Except it's not veiled, and it's not a threat. Like I've been saying, it's just reality.

Sacramento, CA, is where I'm at (and it's no secret). If you want to meet me I'm not exactly hiding. Some kid who wants to talk himself up though, isn't worth much effort. So don't expect me to feel the need to travel to you. I do have a life and work to keep up, after all.

Still if you're actually that passionate about it, and are willing to put the effort to show it by coming here, I'll make sure we meet up. I can at least be that generous. If you're the normal chest beater though, I'm sure you'll find some sort of excuse.

But as far as I'm concerned, unless you arrange to come to me I'm pretty done with yah. Nothing but more bs from yah, and not even witty bs at that. I'd be better off mocking wizzy than dealing with you any more. So send me a pm since I'm just adding you to ignore after this.

[bloodreign]

Nah don't worry about it, with your walmart salary and not so good looks you need to be kind to women.

[Chaosti]

Good intentions Megabyte, and good ideals as well. Unfortunately, the majority of TAO lacks the maturity to appreciate your advice. I would debate the money thing slightly though. A girl gets into a relationship, knowing your financial situation beforehand. What you spend relative to what you have is more important than what you actually spend. So if you have next to nothing (I've got about 3.50 to my name atm), there's still no reason that you can't be in a deep committed relationship. The key thing is that a relationship is distinctive from marriage. In a relationship, you are not at any point required to support or share with the girl. It's nice to do so. We, as men, want to do so (the whole hunter/gatherer mentality). However, if you can't really spend much, that should be okay too. If she can't deal with that, then maybe it's about time to not be in the relationship with that girl. And it goes both ways. She should not have to support the guy during a relationship.

[Megabyte]

Good intentions Megabyte, and good ideals as well. Unfortunately, the majority of TAO lacks the maturity to appreciate your advice.

Could very well be. But an attempt with poor chance of success still has that chance, while no attempt made will never succeed regardless of it's chances.


And I can see where you're coming from on the money issue. I'm hardly someone who's well off in this regard myself, being fresh out of college and only now working my way out of the "broke student" level of income (which is surprisingly more broke than your normal level of being broke...).

Anyways, the idea behind these things isn't that they're required for the relationship, just that they should be forethoughts to them. You can have a relationship without having any money to spend (I have done it myself as well). However, the idea is that your girl deserves better, and you shouldn't put yourself into a position where you can't give it to her. Better to hold off, and get your life to the point where you can give it, in my opinion.

I'll grant that this is probably the most variable concept I keep with, though. Relationships take a lot of variable in that logic and reason just don't mesh well with, a lot of the time. It's just a guide, after all. If it makes people think, I'll consider it a success.

[Jeffery]

I bet if you saw my... 265 pound black ass

I'm pretty sure I'd be barfing.

[Punishment]

Nah don't worry about it, with your walmart salary and not so good looks you need to be kind to women.

I'm 6'9 315 .

Wanna fight?

Come down to the OC my homie, and i'll smack dat ass for you.

[Hugh Junit]

I'm 7'11, and I'm 588 lbs of solid muscle. I can bench press 2,000 lbs......2,000 times!
U want summa dis, beeyatch?

[Punishment]

I forgot to add, I have a Hugh Junit.

[Lord Sesshomaru]

Yeah? well my real name is Haywood U. Blohmee :cool:

[Jeffery]

Yeah? well my real name is Haywood U. Blohmee :cool:
Too bad your nickname is Urinal Cake.

[speaker4thedead]

This is a good thread, but its better because Liquid id beating on dape :D

[the bird]

ohhhhhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhh!!!!!!!!!

[Zoticus]

bitch i'm 6'2 230 I'd ruin your punk ass so don't try to act all tough guy with me

Hmm...

I'm 6'3 and 194 pounds, but I'm mostly muscle. Never judge a fight over height and weight. I know a 5'10 178 lbs guy who could almost stomp anyone, he knows a lot about fighting, and enjoys pain, which is weird. Anyway, you get the point.

EDIT: I guess I should have added, the guy looks like a weak wuss, but you would never guess that he could kick your ass.

[bloodreign]

It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog......

[Jeffery]

I bet you know all the saying that make you small guys feel better about yourself.

[Excaliber]

I have a 10 foot black dick who I like to call "Toby".

[Punishment]

Lawl.

"It's not about the size, it's how you use it!"

You know who said that first? Someone with a tiny dick.

[Wisher]

No one saw that coming, espescially from Puni.

[Lord Sesshomaru]

Lawl.

"It's not about the size, it's how you use it!"

You know who said that first? Someone with a tiny dick.

But then ask yourself what you are going to do with something the size of a Pringles can?

[Jeffery]

But then ask yourself what you are going to do with something the size of a Pringles can?
Pop off the top and reach inside.

[Lord Sesshomaru]

:rofl:

[Liquid Swordsman]

I bet you know all the saying that make you small guys feel better about yourself.

amen.

Being bigger is always an automatic advantage in a fight unless it's like fat slowness, which isn't a problem in my case.

[Serge]

I'm 7'11, and I'm 588 lbs of solid muscle. I can bench press 2,000 lbs......2,000 times!
U want summa dis, beeyatch?
I'm 5'10", 510 lbs and able to generate my own personal gravity field rendering myself immovable. You wanna fight?

[Hugh Junit]

I'm 5'10", 510 lbs and able to generate my own personal gravity field rendering myself immovable. You wanna fight?

Well played, sir.

[bloodreign]

I'M JUGGERNAUT B^TCH!

[Serge]

I'M JUGGERNAUT B^TCH!
What happens when the Juggernaut runs head first into the Blob?

[Lord Sesshomaru]

I'M JUGGERNAUT B^TCH!

Gladiator kicked Juggernaut's ass if you remember right.