/\DarkWarrior/\
01-18-2008, 03:55 PM
Digging up in my old files what seems to have be the result of a very boring month in 7th grade, I find this. I believe it will make you giggle and such. *cue flashback*
Foreward: One night as I lay about my house doing nothing productive in particular, my adolescent mind began to ponder random things. Random things that a twelve year-old boy would think about, from the taste of pie, to the meaning of life. I found my thoughts quite amusing and had one day decided to put them down on paper. So here it is, the culmination of random and unrelated musings about some things taken from the brilliant, and sometimes eccentric mind of the twelve old /\DarkWarrio/\.
NOW IN ALPHABETAL ORDER. kind of.
[A]
Air:
Air is for the weak: real men don't need to breathe.
Attention Span:
There are those that claim I have a
[B]
Barrel Rolls:
As a wise once rabbit once said, do them.
[C]
Confusion:
The second sentence is true. The first sentence is false. The last sentence is true. The third sentence is a sentence. The cake is a lie.
[D]
Dick Cheney:
"HARK! A QUAIL BEITH ON YOUR SHOULDER! DO NOT TRIFLE THOUSELF WITH MOTION! I, CHENEY OF DICK WILL COME TO YOUR AID! HAND ME MY THUNDER STICK!"
Duct Tape:
When it comes down to it, duct tape is quite similar to violence; when something does not work, you use more.
Death:
All things die. Except Vanilla Ice. He's too much of a failure to die.
[E]
Evil:
What is evil? Evil is the term that I use to classify certain people and things that are; A) Something not very friendly, B) Something with an abnormaly spiteful disposition who brings with him an annoying black cloud that creates shadows and lightning during laughter, or C) Kittens (This is due to a deep rooted hatred borne from curiosity, young age, and kitty litter).
[F]
Failure:
When you realize that the button you just pressed said "delete all."
Fanfiction:
The bastard children of rabid fans and their favorite literature. Sure there are those out there that would make their source material proud, but for every good one, there are at least 100 that would make them cringe and question their existence.
Friends:
I have plenty of friends, they're just either invisible...
or dead.
[G]
Girls:
The world would be a better place, if we would know the answer to three questions; What is the meaning of life? If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? And last, but definately not least, what is that girls really want? If it's the peanut butter, then you're gonna have to pry it from my cold, lifeless hands.
[H]
Heroes:
During times of peace, and times of chaos, the people need a hero. Unfortunately, I can't be everywhere at once.
[K]
Kool-Aid:
Why is it that no one is ever phased by the fact that a giant amorphous jug of a powder based drink has just totaled your living space? Furthermore, why on earth would any sane child or man attempt to thereafter drink out of his head, full well knowing that there is probably debris, rocks, and whatever drug he was on floating about in that toxin?
[L]
Love:
What is it? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.
[M]
Money:
Money is allegedly the root of all evil. I say that's bogus. Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a new car. And a pool. And friends. (Not that I need any) Anything that can buy you a new car can't be evil. And as such, I require more money, feel free to donate.
[N]
National Pride:
Only in America would the inventor of the highly coveted “pet rock” earn over three million dollars in profit.
Ninja:
It's a little known fact, but I am indeed a stealthy ninja by the rise of the moon.
Nothing:
[P]
Prophecies:
You shall be mauled by a rabid armadilo within the hour. Prepare yourself.
[R]
Rap music:
Perhaps I just sound ignorant, but does anyone really understand what most rap songs are about? I enjoy the music, but as inquisitive I am, I tend to ask questions such as these. But in all seriousness, other than owning large sums of cash, being all in one's cooking machines, and being something that sounds like "pimple," is there a deeper meaning? Something like the way to a fantastic buried treasure, a heroic epic, or maybe even "please pass the honey mustard?"
[S]
Silence:
Read this someplace where there is no noise.
Seventies, the:
If you remember the seventies, you really weren't there at all.
Sharing:
Sharing is caring, except when it's aids.
[V]
Violence:
An overly homicidal girl once told me: violence isn't the answer... It's just one of them. That overly homicidal girl is incidentally somehow not in jail or the funny room with the padded walls and the jacket that makes you hug yourself,
[W]
World domination:
One of my friends contemplates the prospect of world domination. If she is successful, I was promised a small patch of land off the coast of mexico while others toiled away in the salt mines. But that is of no consequence to me, for once my penguin army mobilizes, and the sasqauch army being amassed in Jared Rich's basement is finished, I, Peter Du, supreme ruler of this earth King CCM who wonders when we shall have this so called lunch and is the supreme ruler of man and ape who bares no relation to Brady Eckenroth who is surpreme ruler of all things one organism, shall rule. And my first decree as ruler of this earth shall be that no such mercy is given. Then, I shall remove all the air from this planet, and pick out the strongest to be my generals. Real men don't need to breathe. Ever.
[X]
Pancakes:
You're probably wondering why this is on here: The "X" is silent, and invisible. Always has been and always will be.
[Y]
Youth:
They say youth is wasted on the young. But if the youth was given to someone old, they would then become young, and the youth
would be wasted, again. But if they were to give it to someone already young, they would... still waste it.
...And that's a taste of it. I omitted some of the even stupider parts for the lost cause of withholding onto whatever little sanity one may have left after reading this. So, go ahead and discuss, tell me your favorite parts, and god forbid, ask for more.
Foreward: One night as I lay about my house doing nothing productive in particular, my adolescent mind began to ponder random things. Random things that a twelve year-old boy would think about, from the taste of pie, to the meaning of life. I found my thoughts quite amusing and had one day decided to put them down on paper. So here it is, the culmination of random and unrelated musings about some things taken from the brilliant, and sometimes eccentric mind of the twelve old /\DarkWarrio/\.
NOW IN ALPHABETAL ORDER. kind of.
[A]
Air:
Air is for the weak: real men don't need to breathe.
Attention Span:
There are those that claim I have a
[B]
Barrel Rolls:
As a wise once rabbit once said, do them.
[C]
Confusion:
The second sentence is true. The first sentence is false. The last sentence is true. The third sentence is a sentence. The cake is a lie.
[D]
Dick Cheney:
"HARK! A QUAIL BEITH ON YOUR SHOULDER! DO NOT TRIFLE THOUSELF WITH MOTION! I, CHENEY OF DICK WILL COME TO YOUR AID! HAND ME MY THUNDER STICK!"
Duct Tape:
When it comes down to it, duct tape is quite similar to violence; when something does not work, you use more.
Death:
All things die. Except Vanilla Ice. He's too much of a failure to die.
[E]
Evil:
What is evil? Evil is the term that I use to classify certain people and things that are; A) Something not very friendly, B) Something with an abnormaly spiteful disposition who brings with him an annoying black cloud that creates shadows and lightning during laughter, or C) Kittens (This is due to a deep rooted hatred borne from curiosity, young age, and kitty litter).
[F]
Failure:
When you realize that the button you just pressed said "delete all."
Fanfiction:
The bastard children of rabid fans and their favorite literature. Sure there are those out there that would make their source material proud, but for every good one, there are at least 100 that would make them cringe and question their existence.
Friends:
I have plenty of friends, they're just either invisible...
or dead.
[G]
Girls:
The world would be a better place, if we would know the answer to three questions; What is the meaning of life? If a tree falls in a forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? And last, but definately not least, what is that girls really want? If it's the peanut butter, then you're gonna have to pry it from my cold, lifeless hands.
[H]
Heroes:
During times of peace, and times of chaos, the people need a hero. Unfortunately, I can't be everywhere at once.
[K]
Kool-Aid:
Why is it that no one is ever phased by the fact that a giant amorphous jug of a powder based drink has just totaled your living space? Furthermore, why on earth would any sane child or man attempt to thereafter drink out of his head, full well knowing that there is probably debris, rocks, and whatever drug he was on floating about in that toxin?
[L]
Love:
What is it? Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more.
[M]
Money:
Money is allegedly the root of all evil. I say that's bogus. Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a new car. And a pool. And friends. (Not that I need any) Anything that can buy you a new car can't be evil. And as such, I require more money, feel free to donate.
[N]
National Pride:
Only in America would the inventor of the highly coveted “pet rock” earn over three million dollars in profit.
Ninja:
It's a little known fact, but I am indeed a stealthy ninja by the rise of the moon.
Nothing:
[P]
Prophecies:
You shall be mauled by a rabid armadilo within the hour. Prepare yourself.
[R]
Rap music:
Perhaps I just sound ignorant, but does anyone really understand what most rap songs are about? I enjoy the music, but as inquisitive I am, I tend to ask questions such as these. But in all seriousness, other than owning large sums of cash, being all in one's cooking machines, and being something that sounds like "pimple," is there a deeper meaning? Something like the way to a fantastic buried treasure, a heroic epic, or maybe even "please pass the honey mustard?"
[S]
Silence:
Read this someplace where there is no noise.
Seventies, the:
If you remember the seventies, you really weren't there at all.
Sharing:
Sharing is caring, except when it's aids.
[V]
Violence:
An overly homicidal girl once told me: violence isn't the answer... It's just one of them. That overly homicidal girl is incidentally somehow not in jail or the funny room with the padded walls and the jacket that makes you hug yourself,
[W]
World domination:
One of my friends contemplates the prospect of world domination. If she is successful, I was promised a small patch of land off the coast of mexico while others toiled away in the salt mines. But that is of no consequence to me, for once my penguin army mobilizes, and the sasqauch army being amassed in Jared Rich's basement is finished, I, Peter Du, supreme ruler of this earth King CCM who wonders when we shall have this so called lunch and is the supreme ruler of man and ape who bares no relation to Brady Eckenroth who is surpreme ruler of all things one organism, shall rule. And my first decree as ruler of this earth shall be that no such mercy is given. Then, I shall remove all the air from this planet, and pick out the strongest to be my generals. Real men don't need to breathe. Ever.
[X]
Pancakes:
You're probably wondering why this is on here: The "X" is silent, and invisible. Always has been and always will be.
[Y]
Youth:
They say youth is wasted on the young. But if the youth was given to someone old, they would then become young, and the youth
would be wasted, again. But if they were to give it to someone already young, they would... still waste it.
...And that's a taste of it. I omitted some of the even stupider parts for the lost cause of withholding onto whatever little sanity one may have left after reading this. So, go ahead and discuss, tell me your favorite parts, and god forbid, ask for more.