advice(no spamming pls)

[...]

me and my girlfriend have been going out for 6 months and another 3 months before that.(so 9 months in total)
she wants a break and says we are getting too involved, and is saying that she thinks that it would be better if we broke it until i move back to town with her.(which is about the middle of summer)
but i AM the jealous type and im asking for a normal break where we are still loyal to eachother and wont screw around on one another.
but she is saying she wants to break up for real until i move back in.......what should i do

(note that we have promise rings, and the whole bit. and we are the perfect couple that u could ever see, people say we will marry someday. AND she does NOT like anyone else or i would alredy know about it, i have lots of sources.)

and please, this is serious, i dont really have anyone else i could ask

[Aro23r]

first off, the Tactics Arena Online Community is not the best source of information like this. (Parents are good, don't be ashamed to consult them.) However, I have been in the same situation, so I will try and help you out as best I can.


I'd allow for the separation. You said she is loyal, so I would not be afraid of her screwing around behind your back. Also, if anything should happen, it wasn't meant to be in the first place.




---Also, when you say 6 months and 3 months, why not just say 9 months, or was there a break in there somewhere?


Lastly, promise rings? C'mon, I'm hoping that was her idea. :p I just don't like things like promise rings, personally.

[thrdflrmshr]

"If you truly love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, you shall know it loves you back."

If not... it wasn't meant to be...

[...]

my parents arent the trusting type......
and she just basically told me she just wanted to screw around with people till i move back, so this is what im thinkin, im going to break up with her and not move back since i cant live with someone that did that to me

[thrdflrmshr]

This depends on a few things, really.

How old are you?
How old is she?
Would you be living together? (Depends on a. and/or b.)
Do you love her? (And I mean love her, as in would you sacrifice the world for her, watch Gone with the Wind three times in a weekend with her, take care of her when her wisdom teeth are taken out and drive 8 hours in the car with her overly opinionated father just to learn the way through the mountains to get to her?)


Answer those, and I'll give you an answer.

[Hugh Junit]

If she wants a real break give it to her. You control what you want and you'll do what you want during the time apart. But you cant control what she does or wants. Nothing about this situation is easy but believe me man....if she wants this then walk away. Otherwise you WILL regret it and you WILL feel bad about yourself. Whatever happens with you two later will be what SHOULD happen. Trust me.

[...]

Originally posted by thrdflrmshr
This depends on a few things, really.

How old are you?
How old is she?
Would you be living together? (Depends on a. and/or b.)
Do you love her? (And I mean love her, as in would you sacrifice the world for her, watch Gone with the Wind three times in a weekend with her, take care of her when her wisdom teeth are taken out and drive 8 hours in the car with her overly opinionated father just to learn the way through the mountains to get to her?)


Answer those, and I'll give you an answer.

1. 17
2.15
3. no
4. yes, i would die for her, and i do drive 8 hours for her everytime i can, i live 4 hours away

[thrdflrmshr]

Then here's what you do.

Leave it be.

Really. It's the thing to do. She's a fickle young girl who doesn't know what she wants, and you're getting to the age where you realize that girls are something more than playthings. I couldn't think of two worse ages to be dating. She's too young to want comittment, and you're just at the age where you need it. I'm speaking from experience here, even though the sterotypical 17-mid 20s guy wants nothing but sex, beer, and more sex, but often stereotypes are wrong. Leave her be and let her do what she wants; if you move back and she comes to you, then good for you and may you always be together. If you decide not to move back, you still make the right choice, because it isn't meant to be. 4 hours is a long way, and believe me, a 15 year old girl is not going to wait around like that. Just let it go, do what your heart tells you, and move on from there. That's the best advice I can give you. Good luck...

[...]

thanx

[green97sierra]

AH!!!!!! oh my dear lord... a few inputs of my very own.
i am a 19 year old college student, and have had a VERY major two year relationship blow up in my face, and i have seen every major high school relationship of my friends all blow up in their face. fact of the matter is, while you are in highschool, you are still a kid. i dont care how much work you do, how many bills you pay, how many brothers/sisters you take care of. hormonal balances dont finally reach until your in your twenties and NOT finishing growing your boobs if your a girl, or certain other unmentionables if your a guy. that being said, there is NO way that ANY kid can decide what they want for the rest of their life. such deciscions can only be made with wisdom. wisdom is expirence + knowledge. at FIFTEEN friggin years old, she doesnt know enough to make a living, let alone decide what kind of a man she wants to spend the rest of her life with. on top of that, there is a MAJOR difference between a fifteen year old GIRL, and a seventeen year old young man. i realize that there is not much of a difference between 23 and 25, but come on, two years in highschool makes a MAJOR difference. just ask how many sienors would even know the NAMES of sophmores, let alone date them. hell, id be afraid that her dad would shoot me. all in all, highschool is NOT The time to be picking your life partner. she dumps you, you dump her, OK! life goes on. your 17, maybe looking at marriage age of 25 to 30 or so-is-able. that gives you eight YEARS of soul searching, not only to decide what kind of person YOU are, but what kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with.

[thrdflrmshr]

Well said.

[...]

ive made a decision, contrary to what alot of people think, i am going to move back with or without my rents permission. i have a brother to move in with..... i just cant stand being this far away and being helpless...and thanx again for all your inputs

[green97sierra]

hey ...., ill talk to you in a few years when you realize that enough is enough, and you two really werent as cute as you once thought you were.

[...]

alrite, but if u have ever met me or if u ever do.
youll realize how different i really am
and i dont mean birth defect different

[thrdflrmshr]

Originally posted by ...
and i dont mean birth defect different

hahahahahahaha

That made me really really laugh. Whoo... It's definitely time to go to bed...

[Hugh Junit]

There is no way to explain the insignificance of a teen age relationship to a teenager. You think you cant live without her and tomorrow wont happen if she is gone. I understand buddy. But take it from a married man who has been there. You can and it will. One day you will look back on this time and think " What the hell was I doing?" But thats all part of growing up. Just do what feels right. Your entitled to be 17 AND act like it. Later.

[Snork]

Originally posted by ...
ive made a decision, contrary to what alot of people think, i am going to move back with or without my rents permission. i have a brother to move in with..... i just cant stand being this far away and being helpless...and thanx again for all your inputs

Well that was a bad decision.
You sort of wasted everybodys time asking for advice if you were just going to ignore it and do that anyway.
Oh well, we didn't have anything better to do anyway.

[Elentari]

Alrighty... Don't take this the wrong way, but WHAT THE HELL KIND OF GUY ARE YOU??? Do you realize that she is 15? Both of you are at no age to be driving 4 hours to see each other with promise rings and other such crap, not even to mention getting married. Trust me, moving just to be near her is a terrible idea and you will seriously regret it when she dumps you 2 weeks later. Think about the long term. I don't think that she is taking it quite so seriously as you (I could be wrong). What affects will this move have on your life? Is it really worth it? I don't really know everything about the situation so I could be horribly wrong, but really think about what would happen. Don't just make a spur of the moment decision to go live by your 15 YEAR OLD girlfriend.

[h()()t]

Well I can't realy tell you much since in 5 grade my girl freand left me for my best freand.......dam I was mad.. BUt I can't help you cuss I am only 12.

[Elentari]

What exactly was the point of that post h()()t? To tell us that you couldn't tell us anything?

[wbwgr]

lol h()()t....that must have really sucked...get dumped for ur best friend...ouch...:D

[Jeffery]

Hrmm, I would say this qualified as Necroposting there Snork.

[Snork]

Originally posted by Jeffery
Hrmm, I would say this qualified as Necroposting there Snork.

I guess so.
Did you have a point, or was that the end of the observation?

[Snarr]

Guys this topic is quite old the dude hasnt been here for ages.

[Snork]

Originally posted by Snarr
Guys this topic is quite old the dude hasnt been here for ages.

I didn't know that.
I don't look at dates when I post.
I just saw people looking at the thread and got involved. :(